Pregnant Woman Refuses To Allow Her Mother-in-Law In Delivery Room And Asks If She Is Being Unreasonable

Aug 26, 2021 by apost team

Pregnancy is a unique and joyful time for mothers, but it isn't always butterflies and rainbows. The experience of pregnancy differs from mother to mother; for some women, it is a breeze while for others, it is filled with health issues that cause anxiety. Either way, all parents waiting for their baby know that when the time for birth comes, it is a joyful and delightful event. 

Before the baby is born, though, there is a lot to prepare for. From childproofing the home to getting all the supplies for when the baby comes home, parents can spend weeks to months deciding what the best way to welcome their baby into the world would be. One of the most important things that a mother has to decide is who she wants present in the delivery room with her. 

Since the coronavirus pandemic began, hospitals have been allowing a very limited number of people in the delivery room with the mother-to-be. While some hospitals don't allow anyone to be with the mother in labor, some hospitals will allow only one or two people. 

One woman on Reddit shared her problem in April 2021 regarding this with other users and explained that her husband demanded that his mother should be in the delivery room instead of the woman's own mother. When it comes to something as demanding and painful as childbirth, it makes sense for a woman to have people she feels most comfortable with in the room with her, so she refused to have her mother-in-law present during one of the most vulnerable and painful events in her life. 

In her Reddit post, the unnamed woman wrote, "Okay, so this is an issue that I can’t deal with. I(28)am six months pregnant. Me and my husband have been discussing who can be in the delivery room." 

She continued, "I told him my mother was going to go obviously and he said he would want his mother to be there. I would be fine that but the hospital will only let 2 people in.
I told him if she went he won’t be able to go. He said he was expecting me to get rid of my mother and and [sic] let him go but I told him that wasn’t happening."

Her decision and refusal to let her mother-in-law into the delivery room caused a rift between her and her husband. "We’re now in an argument and he said he going to go to his friends house. It’s been 2 days and he still hasn’t returned. He isn’t answering my calls either. Now I don’t know where he is," the woman elaborated, and asked for advice on whether she was wrong in standing her ground. 

However, almost everyone who read her post assured her that she was not in the wrong at all. The top comment read, "He wants you to bump your mother out of a major procedure for you so that he and his mother can be there? Really?

You get the last say on this. You should have the people who will support you there, because you being supported makes childbirth easier and creates better outcomes for you AND your baby. If that means your mother is there, that's good for everyone."

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The comment continued, "The fact that your husband doesn't understand that, to the fact that he'd leave his pregnant wife to sleep at a friend's and not answer her calls, tells me he's has no clue what childbirth is about."

Another commenter wrote, "As I was reading this I was internally screaming, it's so infuriating. Now I'm anxious that I'm going to find myself pregnant to someone who reveals themself as an unsupportive ass once it's too late. I just can't fathom how you'd stay with someone like this."

Another user understood the mother's position and provided their own advice after seeing a similar situation play out in their life as they wrote, "My biggest advice to people, particularly women because they're more likely to end up in such situations, is always have a way to get out of a situation. Don't let yourself get so dependent (financially, emotionally, etc) on someone that you don't have a way out."

Other Reddit users continued to support the woman's outlook through their comments. 

The mother provided a small update about the situation in her original post as she wrote, "Minor Edit: I can see you guys comments about irresponsible he is so I will change the locks. I'm texting he shouldn't bother coming back and am highly thinking about getting an attorney. I will update you guys if something big happens" 

There have not been any more updates from her since her post four months ago, but it is likely that her relationship did not withstand the husband's demand.

What do you think of the woman's decision to not let her mother-in-law be with her in the delivery room? Tell us your thoughts, and be sure to ask your friends and family their opinion as well.