Mom Invites Fury For Kicking Daughter Out After New Husband Admits He’s Attracted To Her

Aug 02, 2023 by apost team

Trigger Warning: This article contains mentions of sexual violence that may be troubling for some readers.

The Cinderella effect is a term used in studies to determine the rate at which step-parents are more likely to abuse or harm their stepkids when compared to biological parents. The term comes from the Disney cartoon “Cinderella,” where the main character was abused by her stepmother and stepsisters and forced to take on work that she shouldn’t have been doing. 

According to the Journal of Criminal Justice, research has shown that kids living with their stepfamilies have higher risks of being physically abused or killed than those living with their biological families. However, the article also attributes this to possible reporting bias. 

Already, children living with their stepfamilies have much more to worry about than their contemporaries living with only biological parents. Feelings of worry, fear and jealousy often beset them. A study also found that children living in blended (or step) families are more prone to have issues with depression. They may also have behavioral issues and find it difficult to make and keep friends. 

Meanwhile, some step-parents sexually abuse their stepkids too. While some kids have received prompt intervention when they informed their biological parents, others may get blamed by their biological parents for seducing their spouses. In such cases, they can get kicked out of the house or punished if they are too young. Sometimes, such children are also asked to keep quiet about the abuse.

A mother found herself in a similar situation when she learned that her husband was sexually attracted to her daughter. To deal with the issue, she kicked her daughter out of the house. After seeing her daughter’s reaction, she asked Reddit on July 24, 2023, if she was right. Continue reading to know why she sent her daughter away. 

A 55-year-old Redditor with the username Throwawayme4158 asked the Reddit community for their verdict on her actions on July 24, 2023. The original poster (OP) shared that she has been married to her second husband, 63, for four years, and had a complicated relationship with her daughter, 23.

The mother revealed that her daughter has dissociative identity disorder (DID) because the woman's first marriage was traumatic for her and her daughter. The 23-year-old was also bullied at school, but OP did nothing about it. The daughter still held a grudge over that. 

“The bullying finally ended with an expulsion and a suspension for the ringleaders,” the woman explained. “She still throws the fact that a school clinic volunteer told her that if she was their kid she’d have permission to punch back if administrators didn’t do anything.” 

To help her daughter heal, the woman decided she should live with her and her husband until she was done with school. However, the 23-year-old was introverted and didn’t like company, so she didn’t get along with her stepdad. 

“However, my husband started acting distant from me, and my daughter complained that his eyes lingered for too long,” Throwawayme4158 continued. 

Her husband eventually confessed to feeling sexually attracted to his stepdaughter. 

“I gave my daughter money to stay at an extended stay hotel and asked her to utilize her college’s emergency financial and housing resources they have for students in need,” OP shared. 

Her daughter didn’t take kindly to it, though. She told OP’s ex, who then vilified her online, and OP was stunned. 

“I’m not abandoning my daughter,” she explained. “She qualifies for those resources anyway since my ex is unemployed and we are in substantial debt.” 

Throwawayme4158 added that she only needed time to think about whether to save her marriage. 

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Redditors did not think twice before passing the guilty judgment. They criticized the woman for not keeping her daughter safe. A Redditor wrote: 

“YTA. 1. I have a hard time believing that her DID just came from seeing you and your ex fight. DID stems from repeated trauma before the age of 9-ish. 2. Your punishing your daughter for your husband being inappropriate. Kick him out of the house while you figure things out.”

Another person opined: 

“I feel so bad for that young girl. You are a terrible mother. You failed to protect her before, and you’re doing it again. No wonder why she has issues. What should have happened is that you sent that d-bag husband of yours packing (if it’s your house), assure your daughter that you’ll protect her.”

A third Redditor recommended getting her daughter treated. They wrote:

“Your daughter needs competent mental health treatment. You and her father did not take care of her. You must prioritize helping her get the care she needs. I can’t imagine why you need time to decide what to do about your marriage. Are you considering staying married to this man?”

Many Redditors also suggested that the daughter had been sexually abused, while OP disregarded it before. 

“YTA,” someone wrote. “In this case though it’s probably best for her to live in on campus housing anyway. It’ll probably be the most stable loving home like environment she’s ever had. DID is more often linked to repeated sexual abuse than physical violence. My guess is you’ve looked the other way or straight offered her up countless times. That you’d choose your husband over your mentally ill child now is just proof of that. Stay with your husband, clean break from your kid, she’s better off without you as a mom.”

What do you think of this story? What do you think the woman should have done? Do you know anyone who has been in this situation before? How did they handle it? Let us know — and be sure to pass on this article to friends and family members.

If you or anybody you know is affected by sexual violence, please call the National Sexual Assault Hotline at 800-656-HOPE (4673). The Hotline provides 24/7, confidential support for you or your loved ones, and best practices for professionals.