Struggling Teacher Wants To Return Expensive Present From Class So She Can Buy Food

Jul 27, 2023

As the school year comes to a close, teachers often receive heartfelt gifts from their students and parents as a token of appreciation for their hard work throughout the year. However, one teacher finds herself in a challenging situation after receiving an extravagant Marks and Spencer hamper worth £75 ($97) from her class. 

For any worker struggling to make ends meet, £75 is a significant amount of money, and this particular teacher, who wishes to remain anonymous, was left feeling "heartbroken" by such an expensive gift that didn't cater to her needs amid the ongoing cost-of-living crisis. Unfortunately, the hamper contained several items she couldn't make use of due to religious reasons and allergies, leaving her with only a jar of jam.

Feeling overwhelmed by the financial burden and conflicted about accepting a gift she couldn't fully enjoy, the teacher sought advice on the popular online forum, Mumsnet. Posting her dilemma on the "Am I Being Unreasonable?" (AIBU), the teacher wondered if it would be acceptable for her to ask for the receipt from the parent who organized the gift so she could return the hamper in exchange for vouchers to buy food she could actually use. 

The teacher didn't want to appear ungrateful by asking for the receipt. However, she attempted to return the hamper without the proof of purchase but was turned away.

According to Statista, 92% of U.K. households have experienced an increase in their cost of living as of January 2023. In the U.S., the cost of living has skyrocketed as well, with California, New York, Hawaii, Massachusetts and Washington becoming the top five states with the most expensive livability. Food, rent, utilities and insurance coverage are just some of the non-expendable items on the families' monthly expenses. 

"One of the items is a half bottle of wine, which I don't drink for religious reasons," the teacher explained. "Four of the other five are things with nuts, which I am allergic to and the remaining item I can make use of is a jar of jam."

While the gesture from the class and the parents was well-intentioned, it has inadvertently shed light on the potential drawbacks of end-of-term presents for educators. It also highlights how much things can get awkward for those involved. 

Some commenters in the forum believe that the teacher with the dilemma should just forget about asking for the receipt. One of the commenters, who works as a teacher, thinks it's not appropriate to ask for the receipt. Some agreed with her comments and said it's better to avoid causing tension or ill feelings among the parents. One person pointed out that these presents from the parents are not supposed to be seen as supplements to their earnings, even if they are struggling. 

Another commenter believes that it's reasonable for her to ask for the receipt if she was honest about why she's planning to exchange the hamper. It would also help to tell the parents that she has allergies to nuts and does not drink wine for religious reasons.

"I would be honest and tell the gift organizer your reasons," she wrote. "Religious reasons and allergies are important details for a gift like this. If I was the gift giver I would want to know."

A commenter agreed about being honest with her plans to exchange the gift for groceries, lest the class or their parents might be offended. Instead, they might even be appeased to know that the teacher got what she really wanted, especially when it's clear they think highly of her. 

 Do you give presents to your children's teachers at the end of the school year? Are you a teacher yourself, and did you ever encounter awkwardness in the situation? What do you think is the best thing to do in this situation? Pass this story along to someone who will be able to relate.