Son Gets Slammed For Throwing A Tantrum After His Mom Expects Him To Share A Room With His Grandma

Aug 18, 2023

A Redditor with the username Broad-Anxiety5936 turned to Reddit for advice on Oct. 26, 2022, after her son threw a fit and her husband backed him up. The original poster (OP) explained that she and her husband bought a 3-bedroom house before the pandemic started. They took the master bedroom and asked their children to choose either of the other two on the condition that whoever got the small room and bed would never share, while the child who chose the bigger room and bed would share if they had visitors over. 

“We almost never have family over (hubby and I are both only children, and our parents are in other provinces),” OP explained. 

Their son chose the bigger room, and his sister chose the smaller one. “Both seemed happy with the choice,” the woman added.

Trouble arose when OP’s mom, 83, wanted to see her daughter, whom she had not seen in a while, and she told her son he would have to share his room. 

“Well, my son threw a fit,” OP revealed. “He didn't want to share a room with grandma, not even on an air mattress, not even for 3 nights, she smells funny. So we reminded him of the original deal, and offered to put the air mattress in the living room, but that wasn't enough, he'd have no privacy there.” 

The sister and his parents offered to accommodate him in their rooms against the terms of their deal, but he still refused.

“Finally, I put my foot down and said, the condition of you having the bigger room was that you'd give it up for visiting family members,” the woman wrote. 

She then insisted that her son sleep on an air mattress in any room of his choice. 

OP soon confronted another problem when her husband suggested that her mom stays in a hotel. 

“I asked him who was going to pay for that hotel, since she can't afford it, we can't afford to put her up, and he went silent,” she wrote. Now he's calling me TA for forcing our son to give up his room for all of three nights, and suggesting that I tell my mom not to come at all since apparently ‘none of us can afford it’.

The original poster also added some insight to her story. “My husband has back problems, so also cannot viably sleep on an air mattress,” she divulged to those who asked if her husband could not sleep on the couch.  

She then added, “I also assume that it will be incredibly obvious to everyone why it is not viable for my husband and my mother to sleep in a bed together while I sleep on an air mattress. Not to mention that she would never allow me to give up my bed for her as a visitor.”

OP was not unbothered about her son’s need for privacy either and had taken steps to know if she was missing out on something. 

“I am fully aware of the privacy a 12yo boy requires, we've had that conversation,” she wrote, and added, “and (at the prompting of a couple commenters), I have also recently asked my husband if there was a private conversation between him and my son that would in some way change this situation.” 

However, her husband said there was none, and she chose to believe him since she had no cause to not believe him. 

Redditors sided with the original poster and slammed the 12-year-old who could not share his room with grandma. Some also faulted OP’s husband for not demonstrating authority as a father to a little boy. 

“Yes-the kid is an entitled brat in the making,” someone commented. “There has to be a corner of the house that he can set up an air mattress and a few personal item (computer, 3 days worth of clothing etc for a few days).” 

They also criticized the dad and wrote, “And dad needs to get his head adjusted quick. If he gives in on this then he's teaching his son that he can throw a tantrum and get anything he wants. The son is an AH. The dad is an AH. The mom is right.”

A second Redditor agreed with the woman’s stance. 

“Yep. Kids can throw tantrums. We can choose not to give in to them. Stick to the plan, OP,” they advised.

A third Redditor shared, “My sister and I are both in our 30s now, but we grew up sharing a room and it was the smallest room in the house. I think the push to change how people have been parenting and to encourage more freedom, privacy, etc has been great, but at times goes too far. Needing privacy doesn't mean entitled to the room when there was already an agreed upon arrangement.”

“NTA. Wth? Is your husband serious? How can he let your son dictate the rules of the house. You’re the parent and it’s only 3 friggin nights. Put your foot down on this one. Make your son sleep in the garage for all you care. But be sure your mom is comfortable and happy during her visit. Stand your ground,” another user urged.

What do you think of the son’s stance? Do you think OP was right? What do you make of her husband’s suggestion? Be sure to pass this on to friends and family for their opinions.