Dad Labels His Son As 'Spoiled' For Saying $7,000 Is Not Enough To Throw His Wedding Ceremony

Jul 28, 2023

Weddings are ceremonies that mark the beginning of a marriage between a couple. Weddings are cultural, and different cultures have unique ways of conducting their marriage ceremonies. They are an avenue to showcase the beauty of culture, regardless of whether the couple share a similar culture or are from different cultural backgrounds. Regardless of the couples' cultural situation, weddings are generally enjoyable. Since it is a happy ceremony, there is usually lots to eat, drink and make merry with.

Although weddings are joyful, they are expensive to plan. The planning that goes into a wedding includes clothing for the couples, hotel bills, food, drinks, cakes, makeup and the payment for the venue. What’s more, weddings have always been expensive. 

A 1932 study by the University of Illinois placed the cost of hosting a wedding ceremony at $6,481 (adjusted due to inflation), an amount that was considered very expensive at the time. While a survey by The Knot’s “Real Weddings” placed the cost of hosting a wedding in 2021 at $28,000.

Oftentimes, couples have to cut down on their budgets by limiting the number of guests at their wedding, switching to a cheaper venue, renting wedding clothes and hiring cheaper wedding vendors. But even at that, the high rate of inflation manages to skyrocket the amount required to plan for a wedding ceremony, often becoming a burden for the intending couple and their loved ones. 

A Reddit post on July 18, 2023, showed how the expensive cost of weddings can cause family friction. In the post, the Redditor wanted to know if he was in the wrong for contributing little to his son’s wedding.

A Reddit user who called his son spoiled following a discussion over his financial contribution to his son’s wedding sought the opinion of other Redditors on the issue. He explained that it was cultural for him and the bride’s father to provide financial support for the wedding. However, he was uncomfortable spending the proposed amount to support the couple’s wedding ceremony. The Redditor wrote:

“My (M57) son (M23) is engaged to Peggy (F22). They have been engaged for 5 months or so. Our culture dictates that Peggy’s father and I share the costs for their wedding. He (her father) said we should provide $10k each, a total $20k budget. I could afford this sure but This seems insane and extravagant to me.”

Although the original poster (OP) could afford the proposed amount, he was only willing to pay half of it. When he told his son of his contribution to the wedding, the latter told him that the money would not be enough to cater for it. OP told his son that he didn’t see any reason why their budget was that much when he spent $7000 on his. In response, the son argued that the OP had his wedding 40 years ago, highlighting that things are more expensive now. OP explained:

“He again said he didn’t mind and he thanked me for giving them money for the wedding but I honestly felt hurt that he thought we were not giving enough. I said how could food come out to 2500 dollars and he said that that was only around $25 per person.”

The OP proceeded to make suggestions for cutting the budget, all of which were unpleasant to his son.

“I said it is how things are done, and maybe if Peggy and him weren’t so spoiled and expecting the best of the best for everything then $10k would be plenty.”

Most of the readers on the platform were against the OP, stating that he was out of touch with reality.

“YTA (You're the a**h*le) Your son was incredibly gracious but you had to keep pushing, he even thanked you,” one user commented. “Do you pay the same price for gas, food, clothes etc like 40 years ago ? Do u live under a rock.”

“How ignorant can you be to compare $7k 40 years ago with $10k now? YTA for this alone,” another commented.

“YTA,” a third user wrote. “$7,000 in 1983 is about $24.5k now, so by your logic you should be giving him $12k, not $5k or $10k. Obviously you aren't obligated to give him any money, but he kindly accepted the $5k you offered and you had no place to then berate him about how he was overspending, and you have no reason to 'feel hurt' over this.”

“I honestly think part of it is OP still thinks what he is contributing is too much and trying to actually haggle with his son to look for cheaper options so he isn't paying that much for his share. The fact that his son said he's okay to pay the difference and OP still called him spoiled is what leads me to believe this. OP is TA for sure for trying to make his son feel like crap over this,” commented another.

“Are you also one of the people who acts shocked that students can't pay for a college education outright with their wages from a summer job flipping burgers? YTA,” yet another user wrote.

What do you think of the Redditor choosing to contribute only half of the proposed sum to his son’s wedding? What would you do if you were in his shoes? Let us know and — and be sure to pass this article on to friends, family members and other people you think would have an answer!