Dad Demands Paternity Test After Noticing His Second Son Bears No Resemblance To Him

Oct 05, 2023

There have been different cases in which betrayal and lack of trust in marriages have torn down many happy homes. Trust and loyalty are part of the attributes that bind a relationship or marriage besides love and affection. Once broken, it could take a long time to restore, and some families never come back from it. This is why the resulting effects of betrayal of trust in a marriage have mostly ended up in a broken home.

The issue of distrust came up on Reddit after a user with the name u/DontWantADivorce opened up on the aftermath of his faux pas when he doubted the legitimacy of one of his kids. The dad took to the Relationship-advice subreddit community in 2021, where he narrated how things turned sour in his marriage after he noticed his second son did not look like him. In a bid to allay his worries, he had a DNA test done, but the result of his action affected his marriage. 

The Reddit user started his story by explaining that he and his wife had been married for over 12 years, within which they were blessed with three kids. However, "I always had this nagging feeling that our middle child wasn’t mine." The Redditor relayed that his oldest and youngest children shared a resemblance with him, but his middle child looked nothing like him. 

He shared his concerns with his wife, and she tried to make him understand how genetics worked. He wrote:

"My wife has shown me a picture of her grandfather and he does look a lot like him, but he just doesn’t have any of my family features."

The Redditor continued that his middle child did not look like anyone from his family, and this made him restless. Despite his wife's explanation, he was far from being convinced. 

The thought of his second child not resembling him or anyone in his family while his other two children were a copy of him worried him. To put his mind at ease, he wrote, "I decided I wanted a paternity test." 

The decision to carry out a paternity test was not welcomed by his wife. He relayed, "My wife got pretty upset when I brought it up because cheating has always been a dealbreaker for her, but I just saw that as all the more reason to get one done."

He shared that seeing his wife's reaction felt like the test needed to be carried out right away. The Reddit user added that he informed his wife that "if she had nothing to hide she should have no problem with getting one done." He stated that after the conversation, he went ahead and carried out a paternity test, which ended up proving he was wrong all along and was the father of their middle child.

This level of lack of trust and betrayal can be very hard to come back from, especially when you put your child through a paternity test because of your doubts. The Reddit user continued by explaining he thought everything was fine since he had satisfied his curiosity "and I had my peace of mind." Unfortunately, this was only the start of another phase as one of the effects of betrayal of trust caught up with him. 

The Redditor further relayed that after the paternity test, his wife took their kids to her parent's place and said it would only be for a while. He then questioned "why she exploded," and said that his actions made her consider divorce.

The Reddit user wrote: "That she was furious with me for doubting her loyalty to me knowing how she felt about cheating and that she would never forgive me for what I put our son through, making him question his place in the family."

He then tried to explain that he only wanted to be sure his middle child was his, and she should understand that because they looked nothing alike. He continued:

"She told me she would never forgive me for this, and that I hoped my foolish pride was worth the cost of my family."

The Reddit user noted that his wife said his son was so disheartened over his actions and asked why he did not like him. Also, he had been treating him differently from the rest of his siblings before the paternity test. The Redditor shared that his wife and kids have refused to speak to him, and he needed advice on how to win them back. 

Other Reddit users were not in support of his actions and stated the effects. A user commented: "I have to say the effects on his son are just as terrible as his complete assassination of his wife’s character. He was so paranoid and untrusting of his wife that he was willing to hurt her and his son."

Another user wrote about the son: "He knows his father chose a course of action that would 'allow' him to dump his (obviously unliked) son."

One commenter also added, "Going even further he's going to feel like just because he doesn't look like his dad in any way that he's never going to be fully loved like his siblings." Other Redditors made him understand that his actions had consequences that he must face. 

Do you agree with other Reddit users that the dad went too far? What do you think can be done to fix the damage? Let us know, and be sure to pass this on to others.