Bride Ditches Surprise Wedding Her Boyfriend Planned For Them Because She Felt Blindsided

Jul 06, 2023

A surprise wedding orchestrated by the groom backfired when his girlfriend, the bride-to-be, walked out of the grand event. The incident has since sparked a heated discussion online, with users offering their perspectives on the couple's relationship dynamics.

The bride, identified as a 30-year-old woman, shared her experience on the popular Reddit community AITA in June 2023. She explained that she went to the wedding because she thought it was a fancy party and her long-time boyfriend, Mark, 32, was one of the invited guests.  

To the woman's astonishment, she arrived at the venue to find their family, friends and acquaintances eagerly awaiting them. As it turned out, the fancy party was, in fact, the couple's surprise wedding, as spearheaded by Mark.

Caught off guard and overwhelmed, the bride expressed a mix of emotions. While she loved Mark and envisioned a future with him, the lack of prior discussion or consent about the wedding felt like a breach of trust. She approached Mark privately, conveying her concerns about not being included in the planning process and the need to mentally and emotionally prepare for such a significant milestone in their lives.

Unfortunately, Mark failed to comprehend her perspective, leading the bride to make the difficult decision of not proceeding with the surprise wedding. The unexpected turn of events disappointed and confused their guests, causing tension not only between the couple but also among their families and friends.

Erica Hershey Ross, a marriage and family therapist, told Brides that the very first value couples should agree on, prior to getting married, is trust. This should serve as the foundation that will help the partners create a healthy relationship together. Having trust will prevent resentments borne by failing to consider the other when it comes to decision-making. 

Despite the fallout, the bride clarified that she still loves Mark and wants to marry him. However, she firmly believes that a marriage should be a joint decision, founded on open communication and shared expectations. She emphasized the importance of having a say in the wedding planning process, even though she acknowledged the stress associated with it.

The Reddit community rallied behind the bride, supporting her stance on the matter. Many users criticized Mark's actions and questioned the nature of their relationship and the quality of their friendships.

One Reddit user urged the bride to reconsider her relationship, advising her to "get the hell out of that relationship." Others humorously compared Mark's surprise wedding idea to Gaston's tactics from Disney's "Beauty and the Beast."

The consensus among Redditors was that a wedding should never be a surprise to the bride. Users expressed disbelief at the lack of consideration and questioned who had encouraged Mark to proceed with such an ill-conceived plan. Some suggested that a surprise engagement party would have been a more appropriate gesture.

"He hadn't even proposed yet," another Redditor said. "Imagine not being able to do something as simple as designing your invitations or going dress shopping."

“NOT ONE of the friends and family actually put themselves in (her) shoes and didn't (think that she) might want to have a word on the day, which is supposed to be one of the best and most important of her life…,” wrote another.

As the online discussion unfolded, users expressed hope that the couple would work through their differences and engage in active listening and understanding before making any further wedding plans.

It remains to be seen whether this couple can reconcile their conflicting viewpoints and move forward with their actual wedding. What’s your take on this matter? Do you know of a similar situation? Then pass this on to those you know!